It is better to be an outcast, a stranger in one’s own country, than an outcast from one’s self. It is better to see what is about to befall us and to resist than to retreat into the fantasies embraced by a nation of the blind.
Chris Hedges

Monday, March 17, 2008

Getting Back

I'm slowly making my way back into life. I graduated from the 'Anonymous Treatment Centre' yesterday and am making myself at home in a support house. After four+ months of heeding hundreds of rules (none of them written) I will be weaning myself slowly off what was a very controlled environment. At one of my final group sessions last week, I likened the change to: "putting a rat into a cage with a wheel for five months of structured on-off exercise, punctuated with mild electrical shocks to keep it sharp. Then you take the rat out and put it into an empty cardboard box." The analogy did not impress the facilitator (code-named 'pinstripes')
who objected to my imagery.
So, now what to do? I'll be taking it slow at first, however since I will be writing for a living from now on, expect lots of new stuff. One of my conditions for living in the support house is compulsory attendance at aftercare and family group meetings each week. After 126 days of treatment life will never be the same.

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